This Covid 19 has given me a lot of time to think. I remember the day my workplace closed down due to the epidemic. On my way home, I kept telling myself..."you know this is good.. I am going to go home and paint so much that by the time this is done , the world will know my name". Great motivational speech right?
2 Weeks later and I have half-ass painted one thing. So I asked myself, where is the girl that wanted to paint a storm because Charley ( this is a term used by Ghanaians to call friends) , we still need to work o.
This then led me to think of why some dreams fail and why some prevail. Also made me think of why we sometimes give up on the things we love and the things that we dont necessarily like but sustains us, we keep at it .
Are humans programmed to be miserable in this present world where only 1% is wealthy ?
Since I have several group chats to keep me busy , I asked a group of fine educated ladies this question, "Why do we give up on our dreams ?"
I got quite an array of answered and id like to share with you.
" A lot of times , if those dreams arent supported by the important people in our lives, we tend to put it on the back burner "
"The stress of life sometimes distracts us from our dreams and then we keep postponing until time runs out "
"You grow up and sometimes realize you no longer want that dream or decide other things matter more "
"Sometimes it is us, lack of confidence and discipline to forge on ... sometimes paying bills becomes more important than following dreams "
"Sometimes we like to talk more about our dreams more that actually doing it"
"Sometimes we run into road blocks and we may maintain a high spirit for a long time. But then there is a proverbial straw that breaks the camels back. It may even be a small obstacle , but because we feel like we have been struggling for so long , it throws us off completely when we give into frustration ... ironically enough, the breakthrough could be just on the other side of the final obstacle"
You would think after reading all these comments , I went to paint... Instead I propped on my couch and watch one of the Netflix documentaries that caught my attention. It was called 100 humans and they do survey of people on different things to see what the outcome is. Then the talk to scientist and doctors within a particular field to determine why the outcome was a reflection of. One of the episodes had to do with compliments and criticism and how people function after the get one or the other. It turns out that people are more inclined to do better when they get compliments and rather decline in their productivity when they get criticized.
I am no scientist but I strongly believe that our dreams do get crushed by the words of those around us and sometimes ourselves .Personally, for me as an artist, I have governed myself with "What ifs" for as long as I can remember. I naturally dont take compliments well so when I get criticized , it derails my productivity by a lot!.
This piece does not really answer questions but poses a lot of questions for me . I dont think I have the answers but I believe the comments I got from friends are helpful.
Lets talk . Let me know if you have any input or knowledge on the reasons why we give up on our dreams.